Santa’s 4 Step Fat Loss Plan

Santa has been!

I HAVE to tell you about this funny little guy who showed up at my door on Xmas Eve.

He was short, cute and about 4 feet tall.

He also had weird shoes that curled up at the ends.

And even funnier he had pointy ears.

I asked him who he was and he said he was a messenger from Santa!

Apparently, Santa is getting older and slower, and he’s concerned about his weight now.

He is worried about having heart problems and doesn’t want to drop dead one day while carrying presents to kids due to his weight.

So he wanted my advice.

Can you believe that?

So here’s what I told this messenger to tell Santa:

1. Start eating more protein!

I told the messenger to tell Santa to get those elves to start bringing him more meat and protein, instead of white carbs like bread, etc.

2. Stop eating the mince pies!

When going to down chimneys and seeing plates of mince pies and a glass of milk, ignore it! And instead, leave a note next to them saying next year he’d prefer to be left some meat and cheese instead.

And instead of milk, leave water.

3. Start walking and exercising more!

In other words…

Instead of hitching up the reindeer’s every time he needs to go somewhere, I told the messenger to tell Santa to get his oversized bubble butt outside and walk, it’s great for his heart and entire body.

He doesn’t have to huff and puff and sweat and strain by himself either, he could join my ONLINE programme instead, and do it from the comfort of the North Pole:

http://richard-clarke.co.uk/90dayprog

I said to tell Santa this is NOT based on hard intense exercise. It’s based on using short, achievable routines and was developed by me to get people in shape quickly and safely.

4. Sack 50% of the elves!

Let’s face it.

All those elves are a dead weight, and they mess about too much.

And by trimming his workforce down, he’ll also trim his considerable stomach down too, because he’ll be forced to roll up his sleeves and do more work.

Anyway, so that’s that.

This is the plan I have for Santa.

We’ll see if he listens in 2017.

Richard Clarke

PS – To follow a plan like Santa this New Year*, put down that mince pie for a second, and go fill out a form here now:

http://personaltrainerswansea.co.uk/packages.asp

*Please note, all applications received for personal training and small group personal training will be assessed with a view to start towards the END of January.

Thank you for your patience.

PPS – If you cant wait, the online programme (link above) and slimming clubs are still available, more info here:

http://richard-clarke.co.uk/slimming

 

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *